My heart is in my throat as I exit my chemistry classroom on a cloudy Tuesday, head hung low and shoulders tight after taking a particularly challenging unit exam.

A few days later, after the grades were entered into Powerschool, one of my peers approached me, unprompted, to ask the almost universally dreaded question:

“So, what’d you get on the test?”

Ranked as the 19th best high school in Illinois, South is very competitive. Beyond the scope of state and nationally recognized sports, fine arts, and clubs, competition thrives in the classroom as students constantly compare academic achievements and standardized test scores.

Some things in life are private. Social security numbers, personal finances, and intimate relationship details are all generally understood as things that are not to be shared or to ask for. Yet, when it comes to test scores, South students  have a lapse in judgment.

Senior Madison Gleason has had more than a few instances of nosy classmates asking the detested question. She often feels hesitant at first, but finds herself giving in.

“Sometimes, I just share anyway because of peer pressure,” Gleason said. “But it never feels good to share a bad grade.”

With the majority of surveyed students finding themselves being asked to share their scores, 46 percent of them feel pressure to share their test scores even when they do not want to. This pressure was not created overnight. Instead, it is a perpetuation of the academic culture at South, motivated by students who decide the value of their own grades and intelligence based of the scores of their classmates.

The shame climaxes every year in April, when all underclassmen and eighth graders are required to take the same state test: the ACT. One of the few experiences that unite South students simultaneously tears them apart the day scores come out, as results ricochet throughout the halls and echo inside classrooms.

Each student knows the ultimate score: a perfect 36. For some students, it could be the key to scholarships, expanding college options, and making families proud. But for most students, 36 is out of reach.

Over 48 percent of seniors surveyed reported taking the ACT three or more times. The pressure boils over after test scores are posted on the internet, with texts swarming on all platforms repeating the same question.

Answering the question of  “What did you get?” can come with the cost of heavy shame. But not answering means defying a social norm, subverting people’s expectations, and being different.

Sometimes, inside the classroom, it can feel like sharing test scores can bring a class closer together. If everyone does well, it becomes a celebration. But no matter how high the test average is, there is always one person whose score isn’t the same, scared to speak up,   and alienating them from their peers.

The best way to prevent hurt feelings and disappointment is also the easiest. Not asking at all can still leave both parties feeling satisfied. Also, respecting someone’s choice not to share is respectful and empathetic.

So no, I will not share my test score with you. Not everything has to be a competition.