I’m feeling a little lost. I’m sure most of us are in some way or another. Here I am, staring at the blank slate of senior year, venturing into the unknown land of college admissions, and life after high school. 

I can’t help but feel as if I have little to show from the past three years besides a GPA, extra curricular line up, and SAT score that all could’ve been better. The admission process is clearly going to leave a significant smudge on what was supposed to be a fun, final farewell to South. 

College is supposed to be a time for freedom and excitement, but right now its looming presence is weighing down on my senior year. When I express these feelings to others, I usually get responses along the lines of, “It’ll be the best time of your life” or “You should be excited.” While I know it is something I should look forward to, I can’t help but feel overwhelmed. 

The reality is: time is running out fast for seniors, and for those of us looking to submit our applications by Nov. 1, it can feel like there are not enough seconds in the day.

Classwork consumes my weeknights, and even bleeds into my weekends, so finding time to write my essays is difficult.

Homecoming, football games, and after school activities are hard to enjoy when I am constantly worrying about what colleges I’m applying to and if I am going to get my essays done on time. These anxieties are commonplace within the graduating class, and as the year has ramped up, they have only grown. 

The academic environment South fosters does not make it any easier. Many students attending South take multiple APs, indulge in a whole roster of after school activities, and score high on standardized tests. When it seems like everyone around me is doing so well, it is easy to feel inadequate, and worry about how I will look as a student in front of college admissions officers compared to people that have had the same academic opportunities as me. 

I don’t even know every college that I am applying to yet, and if I am being honest, I have barely any of my essays done. In moments when I should be with my friends, enjoying my final year of high school, I can’t help but think about the uncertainty of what lies ahead. 

When the Friday night lights are shining down on my face and the people around me are shouting “defense,” all I feel is a pit in my stomach, and dread for the future.