Experience of early love outweighs potential heartbreak


Charlie You, columnist

Bumping into someone on the street, catching a stranger’s gaze at a party, sharing a kiss in the rain: Hollywood sure did a nice job of formulating my expectations of falling in love. But contrary to Hollywood’s unrealistic and overly- dramatic portrayals, many of our first love experiences are anything but extraordinary.

First love is arguably the most paradoxical phrase in all of human language. The reason why first love is so beautiful is because at the time of first love, innocence alongside tireless passion foster an unreplicable myriad of genuine and heart-warming experiences between two special people. But at the same time, though it may seem innocent and pure, first love can be utterly reckless, hence the term “first love”.

First love is like picking a random passenger to fly a plane after both the pilots collapsed. Once the passenger takes over, he/she will do whatever it takes—pressing random buttons, calling the control center, trying to beat the pilots back into consciousness—so that the plane doesn’t crash.

Once first love takes over, the individual will do whatever it takes so that their first love comes to fruition. But, like the random passenger who has no idea how to fly a plane, the individual who experiences first love may have no idea how to pursue it, resulting in heart-wrenching disappointment.

Though many of our first loves are surrounded with confusion and awkwardness, succeeding at first love is not at all uncommon. We see it every day amongst the couples at South. But that’s not to say all first loves will be successful. Even after you’ve done everything right—wearing the right clothes, acting the right way, dropping the right hints—if your love is unreciprocated, there’s nothing more you can do.

Love isn’t like a lightbulb where it can be turned on and off as one pleases. Much too often our first loves don’t get a Hollywood ending, but it’s comforting to know that first love is not always fated to fail.

The reason my teen years are rushing like the wind is because I’m constantly in search of answers that just aren’t ready to be presented. My freshman year I wanted to be a pharmacist, my sophomore year I hoped to someday join the Air Force Academy, and now, I hope to pursue a career in writing. If I can’t even decide between a panini or torta by the time I enter the lunchroom, how can I be so deadset on my first love?

First love is a time, meaning once it passes, the feelings and experiences that once accompanied this time can never be perfectly duplicated. Our first loves leave such a lasting impact because everything is based off pure passion.

The unfamiliarity of first love calls for us to be wholeheartedly resolute in our choices: making bold and heartfelt yet risky decisions without hesitation. And, as a result of these spontaneous decisions, the most remarkable memories are made.

Quite frankly, there’s beauty behind this inability to recreate the exact innocence and purity of our first loves. As the pain and bitterness of failing at first love withers, it is then time to give love another shot. With each passing romance, our knowledge of love and how to love steadily grows more mature.

Failing at first love sucks, and though not everyone may experience the sweetness of their first loves, having the strength to overcome the sting of failure for a more mature love might just be well worth a teenage heartbreak.